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Monday, September 3, 2012

Aunt Invasion: Day 2 (AKA "Who's The Boss?")

Baby B slept through the night and woke up at 6:30 a.m., happy and alert.  I figured he was ready to tackle the rest of the AIR ICU Program.  But it turned out that, like any self-respecting kid, B had no intention of spending the last day of summer in school.  

He telegraphed his plan to rebel during the morning’s first diaper change.  Many people had counseled me about the best way to do this.  Most suggested getting the new diaper ready and in place before changing the old.  All parents of boys recommended that I cover key parts immediately on removing the old diaper to avoid getting sprayed during the transition.  I followed both pieces of advice.  Then, I used one hand to hold up B’s legs and the other to do cleanup. 

I was aware that one orifice remained unattended but I had no choice with only two hands to my credit and both fully employed.  I wasn’t that worried, though.  I figured the odds that it would blow up in my face were pretty low.

By which I mean they were one hundred percent.  It missed my face, thank goodness, but managed to cover a fair amount of other turf.  B had just taught me one important lesson, but he wasn’t about to quit schooling me yet.

The next lesson was: “I’ll nap if I want to, when I want to, and where I want to.”  B's day normally features three or four naps for a total of 4-6 hours.  Today, he skipped the first one, skimped on the second and took the third –a two-hour bonanza- on top of me.  

Apparently B was just being polite yesterday by letting me think I was in charge.  

Even though Day 2 of AIR ICU didn’t go quite as planned, my time with B today was as precious as B himself.  And educational.  Here are some other things I learned:

1.     “I Want You Back” by the Jackson 5 makes everybody dance, regardless of age.

2.     When you leave the front door ajar long enough, even the least ambitious indoor cat eventually decides to go on walkabout. (Splat!)

3.     Scooping up a cat with one arm while holding a12-pound baby in the other engages just about every muscle in your body.

4.     If the baby loves it when you belt out “The Wheels On the Bus,” you’ll sing it so many times you’ll get to the fuzzy dice verse.

5.     Nothing—and I mean nothing—sounds better than Baby B laughing.

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